Friends Reunited has its uses, it seems: I’ve found someone I was in school with. Now, you may say, that’s what Friends Reunited is supposed to be for. Maybe so, but usually it doesn’t work. The wonderful thing about this one is that the person concerned is feisty, intelligent and fun. That’s so nice. And (this is the killer) she knows where to put apostrophes. She can spell, she can construct sentences, she can use words well to express her thoughts. She has thoughts!! This is phenomenal, and I’m so happy. However, that’s not what I was going to tell you about on this occasion. I was going to tell you about the Paradise Attic. That’s not the name of a club, it’s a real place. I haven’t been there, but I’ve benefited from it. The Paradise Attic is owned by a chap who lives about ten miles from me. He used to be a teacher, and he found himself in possession of a whole lot of books and tapes that he no longer needs. These were taking up masses of space in his Paradise Attic, so he placed an advert: “free to a good home” type thing. Obviously, I responded to the advert, and I now own (on semi-loan conditions) loads of books and tapes. My bedroom looks like an audio museum. It houses three open-reel tape recorders, two pairs of speakers, an amplifier, approximately 150 tapes for the three tape recorders, my drum kit (including my Zildjian gong), a record deck, about 400 books, my CDs, my sewing machine with all its accessories, my orchid, my geraniums, a large, extendable dining table, two computers, a wardrobe, a dressing table, a filing cabinet, a tallboy and a bed – among other things. Time and Relative Dimension in Space, baby! Oh, forgot to tell you – the Paradise Attic isn’t empty yet. It’s a magic Paradise Attic, constantly renewing itself with treasures that are only treasures for people like me. Ach, don’t worry, I’m paying for these things whether I’m expected to or not. The kindness of strangers is wonderful, but it should be rewarded amply if possible, and it’s possible. I’m ecstatically happy, probably helped by the acquisition of hundreds of tapes, a glass of Merlot and so much espresso and chocolate that I’ve lost count. Therefore I shall walk with the dog. Thunder, I love you! Making holes, but that’s good sometimes, even if it hurts at the time, even if it looks terrible for a few weeks. Sometimes the pain is worth it. Never, never, nevermore. Oh, the beautiful blue sky, filled with swallows and clouds. Rescue. Wait until dawn, then pounce. Now let me share something with you that I would never share with anyone. I’m sharing it with you because you don’t exist. This will remain unread, and that’s the joy of it. My coup de foudre, whom I haven’t seen or been in contact with for many centuries, is in love with another woman! He’s like a love-sick puppy (never seen such a thing!). He leaves her messages that are almost poetic. It’s very touching (apart from the fact that he’s not suffering horribly because he’s not with me). Anyway, she looks very nice, and I don’t know the story behind it. It seems a shame that they’re not together, because he’s obviously terribly in love with her. I didn’t know he was capable of that, so he’s really gone up in my estimation. Oh, don’t worry, this is absolutely on the level. He came into my life as a coup de foudre, and he went out of my life absolutely and forever the day he proposed to me. As soon as he said it we both knew that it was over, dead and gone. Neither of us ever looked back. That’s perfect. That’s how it should be. None of this hanging on, waiting and hoping. That’s just a waste of time and effort. I need another coffee. Perhaps. Oh, why not? Black eyes, go for it! Damn, I’m in a loud mood. Loud and shallow. Damn, high as a kite, a million times higher. It doesn’t take much, just a little life, a little sunshine, my sun will shine. Oh, and I ordered a stylus today. If it’s good I’ll order a lot more. Try it first. It’s not an original, it’s a copy. That’s the problem with owning old equipment. Antique, baby. Yeah. Cement, that’s what you need. Polyfilla. That’s universal. Universal, universe, university. I suppose I’d better walk with the dog before it gets too dark. Maybe we’ll walk to the end of the universe and catch the bus back.