Greetings, spirits. I have been away for two weeks, now I'm back for a week then away for another two weeks, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. My car was broken into, so that was inconvenient. What did "they" take? The usual. Nothing. What's to take? I'm bored. Bored with work. For a start, I'm working for nowt. I have to farm out my lovely dog, which costs me a fortune, pay to have the car repaired so that it can be driven... you get the picture. Can't afford to quit, though. I support too many other spirits. People just can't manage, can they? The old dear is expensive at the moment, and I can't abandon Queen Mab. Besides, how would I pay my williams? They don't deserve a capital letter.

Anyway, this week I have left some very happy spirits behind me in glorious Sheffield, the steel city. I only saw an arts and media city, though the train went past a fair bit of the steel stuff. I did steel once before when I was working in Sheffield. Now I'm hungry, and I need some dinner. The hotel breakfast selection was lousy. The dinner was okay. Not a massive choice. A bit of a cheap skate hotel, I'm afraid to say (Jury's. I know they do it without an apostrophe, but I just can't cope with that). I'm going to make purple velvet curtains for my small room. Yay!!! Cats are so furry and purry.

I'm going to cook dinner, then eat it slowly, washing it down with Spanish oak-aged red. I like old-world wines. And cats. And dogs.

A groovy weekend to all and sundry

Look at this, it's genuine. I found it on the internet (where else?)

It is extremely difficult for foreigners to get a job in Brazil. Your best chance is to look for an employer from your own country and see, whether they have an opening in Brazil. The difficulty is getting a work permit. This applies to all foreigners. Even if the company from your home country offers you a job, the time of your work permit will be limited. Your company is obliged to train, side by side with you, a Brazilian applicant for your job. Once this applicant is trained, your work permit will no longer be renewed. As a consequence, there are only two ways for being able to permanently live and work in Brazil:(1) You can either deposit the equivalence of $200,000 in an account of the National Bank of Brazil, to show that you have sufficient funding to start your own company, or, (2) you can have a child with a Brazilian girl, marry her and then get a residence permit.

Now that's all well and good, but I might find it difficult to have a child with a Brazilian girl for biological reasons. Besides, I don't want a child. And I don't want to get married. I'm very open-minded about most things, but this smacks of using people, and I really wouldn't want to do that. I'm sure that your average "Brazilian girl" wouldn't want to have a child with me, either. People clearly have very odd ideas about women. It suggests that "Brazilian girls" are just waiting around to have children with foreigners. This shows a distinct lack of respect for half of the human race. Maybe the advert is just meant to disgust you enough to put you off looking for work in Brazil. Maybe.

It's half past five. I've had my cream in brandy (I ran out of milk). I'm going to bed. I hate lurgies. See, I can moan manfully. I have learnt this trick. Damn.

Poorlier I am. The lurgies have not gone away. I'm going to bed.

Poorly I am. The lurgies have attacked. They're not nice.

It's the weekend, I'm surrounded by my lovely dog and cat and I'm excited! Reasons for excitement: have been offered extra voluntary work which I have foolishly accepted because I think it will be fun; have been informed about a conference in Finland which I'd like to participate in (and giving a paper would be the cheapest way of doing this); I'm not going to see my old dear this weekend. Isn't life groovy? Okay, I know I've been evil and I haven't done any work for the fud, but darlings, I will, I will. I know you've heard that before, but, you see, this is a spur for me. It's well good. I have a very nice book to review, so I'd better get on with that too. Plans for this weekend: to do more of the decorating (this is desperate), to do more of the baking. This weekend I intend to make the logs and the BFGs. A chocolatey weekend. I'm so excited! Woooooooooh!

Coffee is bad for you, but good for me. Alcohol is bad for you, but good for me. Exercise is good for you, but bad for me. Seasons turn, life exists, existence is. Bah. The dog is dirty and needs a bath. Truncated. Iconic. Tonight I needed to read Eliot and Musset. A bit of a contrast. And a friend reminded me of the chintzy chintzy cheeriness that Johnny described. The cat sat on my lap, purring, purring, purring, purring, oh lord thou pluckest me out. Tomorrow I shall be in County Durham once again. Not sure where I'm supposed to be going, so I'll set off and hope that somebody tells me the address somehow. Our new systems are so efficient. Darlings, I'm rereading Damals war es Friedrich. Yes, I know it's a kids' book, but it's interesting. I liked it when I read it in translation, and now I'm ready to read it in German, so that's good. And the Queen is right: the sentences are short and uncomplicated. It's an easy read. The fud goes not at this moment. Too much to-ing and fro-ing with the old dear. Too much. I have baked. Forgive me father, for I have baked. What have you baked my child? I have baked Christmas cakes (three), cider crumble cakes (two), fruit tarts (five) and I've made the Christmas puddings (three). I've made the mincemeat too. What is my penance? Three lots of washing-up and a full freezer to sort out. Damn. Another penance for the damn. The damned. Okay, enough. Where are they? In the attic? Dry thoughts in a wet season. Wet, wild, windy winter weather. Autumn has gone for the moment. Musset. Nuit d'octobre. Nuit de mai. Me gusta Musset, but I'm not sure why. Ce livre est toute ma jeunesse. Maybe that's why. And tomorrow we dance.